Christians and offense


Christians and offense

Dear Christians,

We need to learn how to handle our offenses with one another.

I get sick to my stomach when I think of all the people that I know who can’t be in the same room together who at one point in time were able to worship our God together.

I think of all the time we rejoiced, prayed, and encountered God together and how different fallings out and offenses have put that all to an end.

It’s awful.

I understand that we won’t ways see eye to eye, but can we learn to do so graciously? Can we graciously leave a congregation without having to throw shade? Can we graciously allow people to leave without badmouthing them? Can we attempt to talk things out and build bridges so that people feel like they have the option to stay?

I don’t know exactly what the root cause of all of this is, but if I were to hazard a guess, I’d say that it’s because we fail to communicate with one another in a life-giving way.

We fail to take the perspectives of others. We fail to extend grace to those who are weak. We assume the worst. We respond emotionally instead of rationally. We altogether fail at communicating. I could go on and on.

We need to stop.

The next time someone does something that offends you, even if it’s a problem that’s been brewing for awhile, chose to extend grace instead of being offended.

A house divided can’t stand. Let’s stop splitting and dividing ourselves for no good reason. Let’s think the best of and build one another.

Thank you for letting me vent.

Sincerely, the Armchair Commentary

2 thoughts on “Christians and offense

  1. I think we also should note that, even if we FEEL offended, we don’t have to ACT offended. We can still CHOOSE to treat the person we are offended at with respect and dignity.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I think a lot of times Christians say they’re “extending grace” to someone by not talking to them about it, when really they just remain offended. I would say in 99.9% of issues of offense, the person who is offended needs to approach the one who offended them and talk it through. I would also say that since we’re so messed up and it’s also biblical, 99.9% of the time if you know someone is offended with you (even if you don’t know why) you should approach the person who is offended with you seeking to reconcile the relationship at all personal costs!

    The bible says blessed are the peacemakers. You have to MAKE PEACE to HAVE PEACE, but it’s hard work plowing the field of actual relationships. The soil isn’t fertile immediately, it’s filled with rocks and weeds. It is truly rich and fertile underneath, but it takes a lot of labor to get there. Many aren’t willing to make that sacrifice.

    Liked by 1 person

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